Dick of the Week, Feb. 21-27: NOT Moammar Gaddafi

27 Feb

Well here we are once again, another week and another dick to choose.  I have thought about this one long and hard, and I cannot declare another tyrannical executive to be the Dick of the Week.  I can’t do it.  Granted this man has been oppressing his people and is preparing to fight them in an increasingly bloody exchange.  This man has criticized the UN and even torn up a copy of the charter before the Security Council.  Any man is willing to order military action against his own people is an absolutely deplorable individual not worthy of our satire. The saddest story was when a plane full of soldiers crashed because they REFUSED to bomb their own people.   I don’t know anything more telling than that.  You military has refused an order because they are even beginning to question your leadership.

The dumbest statement of all has been that Gaddafi mentioned that he would become a martyr after this conflict was over.  I realize he has been a fixture of the past revolutions and as leader he has a certain image within the nation.  But really, it’s not for you to say whether you will become a martyr.  In fact, it’s really just insulting to the memories of people that ARE martyrs.  You don’t get to say that people will remember you; not really your call.  And I’m not really sure you’re going to be an admirable fixture for the people you’re bombing.  They probably won’t all say, “well at least he fought for a cause.”  Clearly this man is insane and the events that have transpired aren’t something I really want to comment on any further.  SO let’s try this again, Take 2.

Dick of the Week, Feb. 21-27: Zachary Adam Chesser

This is going to a different situation because this was an incident that happened long ago, but I am very excited about the precedent set by the result.  Zachary Adam Chesser was the man who encouraged violent retaliation against South Park creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone after they depicted the prophet Mohammed in a bear suit.  It was a joke, as stupid as it may have been, it was a satire of the fact that it is wrong in their religion to create a picture of the Prophet.  They didn’t actually show him, no one should take too much offense to it.  They are not the first ones to push this envelope and they probably won’t be the last.  What I liked was the fact that this man got 35 years in prison for such a threat.  I think civilized discourse is an important thing to have in our society, and one of our most redeeming qualities is that we can (for the most part) respectfully disagree with each other (at least normal people can).  If you found the South Park joke offensive, you are free to call the creators idiots or uninformed or just respectfully say that you found it offensive.  But what you cannot do is threaten violence against them.  Don’t watch the show or just don’t pay attention to it.  If it becomes ok to say that, then it’s ok to say it back, and that’s a very slippery slope.  So, I am very happy that the price is so high when you try to threaten someone for using their free speech.

Now, to the ones who came close.

Sent from My Congressional BlackBerry

(Former) Congressman Christopher Lee (R-NY): Hey, I thought he was already a runner-up, you can make the list more than once?  Yes, sure why not? If you keep being a dick, you are always in the running.  See, his prompt resignation not too long ago was understandable but seemed a little over the top.  Did he have a little something to explain to his wife?  Yes, he did.  But as we reported, he was not necessarily taking part in an activity that is uncommon in the world.  What we DIDN’T know was that he wasn’t only looking for women.  Apparently he was a classy guy looking for passable transsexual to spoil.  My first reaction is that I never ever ever want to find out how one spoils a transsexual, and, suddenly, we know why he was so quick to leave.  Womanizing is one thing, seeking sexual encounters with “people in transition” is something entirely different.  I would have liked to see him stay in Congress just to see the questions that people would ask him on the floor.  CSPAN would have gotten a lot more interesting, I’m just saying.  Having to explain marital infidelity, tough.  Having to explain marital infidelity involving women who were men, uhhh good luck with that.  

Polygamist leader Warren Jeffs: This guy is standing trial for polygamy, marrying underage people, you know the usual crimes involved with these whacky religious cults.  Then, he ousted 45 members in his church because they were a threat to his leadership, which he was still active in from jail.  My first reaction is to say way to snitch on your friends and take more people away from their families…wait, you thought that 45 of your high-ranking members were a threat to your leadership.  How big is your church?  10,000.  Wow, 10,000 polygamists.  That’s a little creepy that there are so many of these people out there.  I’m going to keep this one on the list because this guy helped reveal that there are more than 2 other people like him, and that just freaks me out.


One Response to “Dick of the Week, Feb. 21-27: NOT Moammar Gaddafi”

  1. katie March 1, 2011 at 8:57 am #

    yeah nice

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